Astrological Answers by Albert Clayton Gaulden

Dear hearts, if I could have a minute of your time to turn on the lights—name a phenomenon that so few of us have tagged as bottom feeders working their way to the top, (I am speaking about the three selves that have been taken over by, like Daniel Webster, the devil). Ladies and gentlemen of the jury I am writing about the three culturally deaf, dumb and blind stooges, belials, laggards and robotoids.

These three sub-human groups are beyond the susceptibility to trance and swoon—they were born spiritually, emotionally and ethically dead at birth. If I am beginning to sound like a rerun of the Twilight Zone with Rod Sterling talking over scary music, get with the stream of consciousness. Rather than screech over Amber Alert or nose around to see if there are sexual deviates living in your neighborhood, open your inner eyes and ears to these predators who are making the world a worse place to live.

This walking dead caste system is recognizable from their glassy eyes to their chin dribble to their herd mentality (…and they never read Henry Wadsworth Longfellow’s poem that says…”In the world’s broad field of battle, in the bivouac of life, be not like dumb, driven cattle, be a hero in the strife!”); they hear the name of a “savior”, roll their eyes and quote dogma; they are tattooed with swastikas and believe that a woman was made for a man’s pleasure; they sit hour after hour after hour listening to the gospel according to Bill, Sean and Allan, Ellen, Oprah, Nancy and Wolf—the television hierarchy—quote them and give their power away to them—let these talking heads tell them who they are, what to read and how to think—no discernment, just “dumb, driven cattle”; b, l & r think movie stars are royalty and treat them as such; wouldn’t know androgyny if it knocked their door down and Om-ed them into Zen-villa; in the South I referred to them as Bubba and Wanda—the archetypal good ole boy and good ole girl who never had an original thought and hated anything artistic or refined: ‘that’s for queers’—and a lot of them lived on Country Club Drive. (There is something beautiful about the humility of tilling the soil and singing in their hearts, “Nearer My God to Thee”—but not in brain-dead beer-guzzling tailgating and raising your kids to think that Bear Bryant is President of the United States. I taught high school Civics one long year in Woodlawn High School in Birmingham in 1963 and in the belials-filled class I taught, eleven of the eighteen answered, ‘Who is President of the United States?, with ‘Bear Bryant’. They cheered when President John F. Kennedy was assassinated).

And the underpinning of belials, laggards and robotoids is the dim-wittedness of egoism and the close-mindedness of bigotry. They absolutely offer nothing to the world; rather they take what is not theirs. And a lot of them graduated from Harvard and Yale; are members of country clubs, and always loll around the good ole boys’ (and girls’—yes, Dorothy, you are in a bad, narrow-minded coven, dear!) club. The real badge of honor that they wear is that they are narcissistic and believe that “it” is all about them. They give to charity and always call the press to show their generosity—I know one actor who refused to ladle soup in a halfway house until the press was there to see her. I know spiritual bigheads who walk off stages after moving their audience to tears and move the poor, dumb acolytes who serve them to rage with their bad-boy/bad-girl behavior. If hell opened up, they would be the one holding the pitchfork. Take a peak behind the curtain and see how some of these spiritual gurus really act. It will make you sick to your stomach. (Did you catch Dr. Phil betraying Britney Spears a few weeks ago? Dr. Phil, you are not a nice person even if you got anointed, er, I mean, appointed by Oprah to host your own b-o-r-i-n-g television show).

Do you think that you are a belial? How about a laggard? Robotoid, anyone? Keep reading.

If not, may I ask you why do you keep listening to Presidential candidates rant and rave and hack each other to death? Do you really believe that Hillary Clinton is nicer, softer, and gentler because her War Room told her to knock it off, ‘Make nice?’ I’ll answer that last question for you: HELL NO! The same goes for John McCain. And Mike Hucklebuckleby. Did you pay $2,500 for a ticket to the Super Bowl when that money could feed a tribe of starving men, women and children for a month? I know someone who paid several thousand dollars years ago to see Barbra Streisand in Las Vegas. What was she thinking? Barbra Streisand? Give me a break. (Maybe Bette Midler—now there’s a chanteuse with an ‘over the rainbow’ act to stop and restart your heart—throw your ‘whatever’ at the stage for the price of a $30.00 ticket—come back, Bette!) God, don’t get me started! You will know these knuckleheads because they think they are the car they drive, their clothes, their house, their hair (only in Texas) and who they know. Give me another break and ignore them when you see them—and never take up their behaviors.

What is the antithesis of these three cultural blood suckers and do-nothings? Someone who stands up and says we need someone new and transcendent as president and refuses to let talking heads and pundits tell us who these politicos are and what the polls are saying about who will win. Treat actors like workers, doing a job for which most of them are vastly underpaid and abide on poverty wages—and never ever train your rug rats to worship at the throne of hip hop, rap, wrestling matches (talk about your robotoids!), rock stars, jocks, jock straps, rich men or poor men breaking and entering to exist—give your charges a chance to find themselves inside, not outside, themselves. Who knows, if they can wean themselves of movie star-itis, one of them may just grow up to be the president of the United States.

George Clooney thinks we ought to do something besides talk about Darfur and other incinerators of torture and abuse and starvation and thirst. More about him later.

My business partner (and one of the greatest reasons to go to work every day—he is a lot nicer than I am), Scott always reminds me to leave you readers with a dash of hope after I dish reality as I see it. (It ain’t no accident that reality TV train wrecks have replaced network million-dollar shows in the ratings game—talk about your narcissism and self-centeredness—have you caught those Kardasians?—make Bruce give back those medals—for shame!)

So my next make-nice, no-fat, no-caloric, no-sugar entry for the day is about superstar and proactive compassionate George Clooney.

He is AUTHOR OF Clearing for the Millennium, �Signs and Wonders-Understanding the language of God and You're Not Who You Think You Are-A Breakthrough Guide to Discover your Authentic Self will be published by Atria Books, a division of Simon & Schuster in December of this year.

A member of the National Association of Transpersonal Psychology and the American Federation of Astrologers, Gaulden founded the Sedona Intensive, a personal growth and empowerment program, to help clients retrieve their authentic selves and tap into their inner power.

Gaulden coined the term astroanalysis-a combination of Jungian psychology and astrology-to describe how he helps free clients from compulsions, addictions, and unresolved issues, which keep them from living a life of peace and joy.

Albert saw things others didn't and heard what they couldn't from the age of two. When he was five he asked his mother why she seemed more like his dad and his dad more like the mother. As a pre-schooler he was tuned into the rich world of intuition and past lives even though he had no one to shepherd him through these recollections and recalls. At Birmingham-Southern he click connected with the unique psychological work and world of Swiss psychoanalyst, Dr. Carl Jung and his take on the shadow self. Gaulden believes that all-seeing and all-knowing is born within a child and it is the false and mundane world that erases his memory of what is really true. The integration of the divided self, putting one back together through a conscious fusion with his or her shadow is the underpinning of his work in the Sedona Intensive.

Albert studied with renowned astrology Byrd Knapp, Darrell Harris and Katharine de Jersey, as well as took Awareness Classes with Lee Jones at the Spiritualist Church in Los Angeles in the 70's, and attended the Corrado Academy of Perception in 1978 which led to his meeting actor John Travolta using the tools of manifestation learned at the Academy, and selling John El Adobe de Tajiguas, a 35-acre estate that abutted Ronald Reagan's ranch near Gaviota Beach in Southern California.

Gaulden worked in 1986 with international-best selling author of The Celestine Prophecy, James Redfield in Albert's innovative and one-of-a-kind personal empowerment program, the Sedona Intensive, which he founded in 1982. Albert was hired to use his gifts as an astro-intuitive to help cast Redfield's movie of The Celestine Prophecy.

Gaulden travels the world to teach and speak and finds Egypt particularly one of the most intriguing countries in the world. In December he will be returning with a tour group of clients and friends to the Land of the Nile and Pharaohs and the Great Pyramid of Cheops, the Sphinx and other ancient digs and monuments in Upper and Lower Egypt.

His clients include sports figures, actors, royalty, Wall Street executives, men and women and young people from all walks of life who are eager to face those defects of character that keep them from being who they really are. He rigorously maintains the anonymity of his clients.

Additionally, Gaulden is a motivational speaker on such popular themes as "Mr. Right is Usually Mr. Wrong-Falling in Love With Make-Believe", "Take Your Power Back", "The Power of a Great Idea", the Death of Terror and the Rebirth of Bliss, �"Why Relationships Don't Work but How They Can" and many other provocative topics.